Jeremy Renner has seriously leaned in on his post-Avengers life. Which is odd, considering he actually has a Hawkeye deal with Marvel. We discussed his latest musical venture. But we haven’t discussed is his Amazon Shop on which he is selling rugged outdoorsy gear, including a bunch of archery items. I’ll say it, the stuff he’s selling is pretty cool. But the reason to visit the store is to look at the photos of him… not really using any of it properly. In most cases, he looks like he’s trying to tame nature with an intense stare. Jeremy Renner: Master of the Nature Glare.
But the big news I learned this week is that Jeremy Renner had his own app. And I learned this because he announced he was shutting it down. Ah man! Now I’ll never get to use the app I didn’t know existed. This one’s on me because the app has been around since 2017. Which one of you hid the Jeremy Renner app from me?! The idea behind the app was so Renner superfans could connect with each other. I guess Comic Con was sold out? App users had access to exclusive content, which included music, photos and live-streams. One could also earn or purchase stars. Not stars like any of the Chrises, actual electronic stars that served as app currency to purchase said exclusive content or win prizes. The more stars you had, the higher you were ranked. I can only hope that the ranks were homages to his career, “Congratulations on being Bourne!” “Click to receive the combo to your new Hurt Locker.”
My gawd but I miss the cancelled app that I knew nothing about.
Anyway, thousands of Rennerites were destroyed when Mr. Hawkeye himself posted a note about closing down his app for good and why he had to do so:
Fancy font says what now? For anyone who strained an eyeball trying to read that, here is the opener to his farewell message:
The app has jumped the shark. Literally. Due to some clever individuals that were able to manipulate ways to impersonate me and others within the app I have asked ESCAPEX, the company that runs this app to shut it down immediately and refund anyone who has purchased any stars over the last 90 days. What was supposed to be a place for fans to connect with each other has turned into a place this is everything I detest and can’t or won’t condone. My sincere apologies for this to have not turned out the way it was intended.
To understand what happened, you need to know a little about how the app worked, which I didn’t because no one thought to tell me about it. Apparently, when anything happened on the app, you received a push notification from Jeremy Renner. It was the app contacting you, but the notification popped up with just his name and face and whatever message it was trying to convey to you. So it might be Renner telling you you’ve risen in the Renner Ranks or it might be that Renner posted a new pic with some caption designed to read like he’d just rifled it off on the run, “Happy Rennsday!” But, as I said, it was any notification. So if another app user replied to a comment you wrote, at least in the notification, it looked like Renner himself had sent it. It was all very personal, and I’m sure made fans feel close to the actor. (Which, while we are on the subject, is probably why he went with a “handwritten script” font to write his send off, for that personal touch to all those users he’d never known.) But everything backfired in a glorious online free-for-all when some cheeky user figured out the format could be used to mess with everyone reading it. I don’t actually know if this is the beginning of the app’s decline, but Stefan Heck is taking credit for it so I’ll give it to him. He responded to a Renner post asking folks for their weekend plans with a comment saying he was going to watch porn. And everything spiraled from there. People created accounts under celebrity names, including Renner’s, and the place descended into madness:
the jeremy renner app is absolutely out of control pic.twitter.com/Il6iiYMWaa
— Kate Knibbs 🐋 (@Knibbs) August 29, 2019
The Jeremy Renner app is pure chaos I can’t get enough pic.twitter.com/OLmlPRxWlQ
— Kenjac (@JackKennedy) August 29, 2019
some people are trying to use it nonironically, this is my favorite pic.twitter.com/QRaJd9LnPJ
— not /tilting/ (@YABOYNICKYG) August 30, 2019
Apparently, the app tried blocking folks but that didn’t work so Renner threw in the towel (since there is no way to “literally jump the shark” with an electronic application). I do, in fact, feel a little bad for Renner. It sounds like the folks the app was intended for enjoyed it. Who knows how involved he was with it but if he was, I’m sure he enjoyed it as well. The app wasn’t actually hurting anyone and was certainly not in your face enough for some of us to even know it existed. But two years is a good run for any online community that is unregulated enough to allow someone to front as Barack Obama or Casey Anthony so I hope Renner takes this as a win.
At least now Renner can get back to the important work, like trying to figure out where the binoculars go when you use them.
Jeremy Renner has his own store on Amazon with bear spray and cross bows and I can't! 😂😂 pic.twitter.com/w7IQAkTBTq
— celebitchy (@celebitchy) September 4, 2019
Photo credit: Twitter, Amazon and WENN Photos
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